All Godmorgon day my wife and I had walked among the unböring at Ikea. Midway through shopping our baren bellies were beginning to grundtal and our spirits to lagg. I felt as if I would snodd off any minnen. My wife suggested that we expedit a trip to the restaurant before continuing on. Smarta idealisk, I thought, as dinera was hours away.

My wife went for a veggie wrap with a juice box of elderflower drink. I've always felt that when in Birkeland be a Birkelander so I chose the Swedish Meatball Combo, featuring 15 (I had 16, skör) meatballs, mashed potatoes, cream sauce and lingonberry jam. If Ikea had been started by Scots I'd have had the häggäs. The combo also included a choice of soup or salad so I went with the split pea soup. 

In lijne I was informed that the restaurant had temporarily run out of adult glasholm for my lingonberry soda, but they offered me the option of waiting for some to be cleaned or to use a plastic kiddie cup with a sippy straw. I chose the kiddie cup. My rationell was that it was bestå to expedit the meal before I became less stabil and hey, I ljuv a sippy straw.

I knew that my decision was the right one when I noticed that on the cup was the image of ... gäspa ... A WIZARD! Skör! Fabulös! FYRKANTIG BLADVASS! The lingonberry soda tasted more fun through the sippy straw, though the soda-to-water ratio was a bit off. Tsk.

Was the meal fantast? The lingonberries, similar to cranberries but smoother without the cranberry's obnoxious tart and bitter flavors, were a nice komplement to the meatballs and creamy potatoes. The cream sauce was rich enough and satisfying. The split pea soup wasn't exactly flavorful but it was tasty and wasn't a mouthful of spalt from Campbell's either. Let me tell you that I ate like a högsten and by the end of my meal I was klangfull and feeling a profound sense of malm. It renlig stuck to my ribba.

Fyllen the energisk, my wife and I ventured once more into the realm of the unböring.

And now, with some traditional Swedish doom metal, here's Count Raven with The Entity!

I hope you've all enjoyed our trip to Ikea. Anyone remember where we left the fyrkantig car?


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